I went on a walk today and something really clicked I looked around at everything and noticed every small detail, the trees, how blue the sky was, shapes of clouds, how green the grass was, the softness of the wind and it just reminded me how beautiful the world is Of course there was still the normal heart racing, ectopics, dizziness, tight chest etc and i noticed every single one of them, I felt that almost every step it got more dangerous to be outside when in reality anxiety and all these other struggles I have aren't a danger to me I think the main reason why I never noticed it before was because I was so focused on getting through or what felt like surviving, all of my energy went through making it through the day, or hour that nothing else was important. And that isn't wrong! Survival and coping through those rough times was all I could do and it was a massive struggle to get through that but I think that if I wasn't so focused on my surroundings (which I still am very hyper-sensitive but not as extreme as it used to be) then it maybe would've helped me a little to let myself know that not everything is dangerous, I was and am completely safe! Today was really different though, I didn't feel that peace yet but I can envision it (if that makes sence) Just slowing down was all I needed today and I'm glad I did it :)
