ugh! Did not have the best time at the Cardiologist today. Actually it was the worst visit I've ever had. I don't want to go to deep into what is wrong with my heart because I don't want to "trigger" anyone, as the kids these days say. But needless to say she said I probably only have another five years before I will need the valve replacement surgery I have known I would eventually need since I was in my 20s. With the way time goes by now, that might as well be tomorrow! She is going to set me up with some more tests, and she gave me an 30 day event monitor. I know its not super healthy to say this, but I've done these monitors before and I love them, they make me feel safer, because there is someone always monitoring me. I may or may not have cried for a few seconds after the doctor left the room. But only for a second. Its not all doom and gloom though, because my blood pressure was normal, which is good because been kind of high for the last year. Not needs meds high, but kind of high, AND she did say that when I get this new valve it will likely be mechanical so it will last me the rest of my life and I will basically never have to think about it again. I just have to get through the surgery, that is the scary part. I've been dreading it pretty much my entire adult life. Its a win though because I even though I might (won't confirm if I did or not LOL) cried for a second or two when I was alone, I didn't go into panic mode, which I was pretty sure I would. So I am coping
