The past few days ive found it insanely difficult to get myself into school and stay the whole day or atay in lessons. 2 days ago i managed 3/5 of my lessons and the 3 i went to and sat through i barely did any work and couldnt concentrate due to anxiwty and being really overwhelmed, having panic attacks on an off for not one single clear or blurred reason Yesterday i managed 1 of my lessons and went home. We got our predictions on what our result will be in about 5 months time, from our previous assignments set and my results are massivly worse then i thought they would be, some key topics i need for what i want to do are ones i barely have a grade for (either U, grade 2 or 3) its the first time ive seen a U on a predicted grade in my case and its realy sent me spiralling more than i already was. I wasnt present in the day. Yes physically i was, but mentally i wasnt, it didnt feel real and to be honest it still doesnt i went to the support system i have in my school and they told me they didnt know what to do with me and said i needed to srop overthinking because ita making it worse, like i dont already know that I made it up to my second lesson but didnt do any work, didnt even get out my book. That day i didnt stop thinking, and if i werent having panic attacks i was having anxiety attacks inbetween, no break and im exhausted and in pain from physical symptoms that have shown because of anxiety My win is that i took today off, to give myself a break. Which in itself i dont see as a win, im missing out on lessons that i do need but in reality i know i wouldnt get through them. Im hoping to go back tomorrow, im not trying to go down a path of avoidance again but im slowly getting by day by day
