Last night I experienced a nocturnal panic attack, which normally would make me spiral - these particular panic attacks are what led to my health anxiety which began last fall. It was uncomfortable, and reminded me of how I used to feel but I allowed the panic to wash over me and to make itself present. My anxiety, although challenging, needed to make itself known last night for whatever reason. There's so much that can go on in the subconscious mind that we aren't even aware of; I thought I had a calm day, but the body is always one step ahead. Anyways, I felt all of the classic symptoms - racing heart, sweating, fear - but instead of latching onto it too deeply, I felt it and I gave it the space it needed almost like a friend that needed to vent. Thankfully one of my safety people, my mom, was there to support me but I am very proud of myself for how I moved through the panic attack. I was deeply uncomfortable but I told myself: "discomfort is not dangerous." It might FEEL intense but our feelings aren't always the best indicators of reality. In reality, without any judgement or obsessive thinking or making meaning, my body just needed to take out this anxiety and the most loving thing I can do for it and for myself is let it. Treating my anxiety like a friend instead of an enemy helps a lot. Also side note: I visited a park yesterday and found these ducks all in a row 🦆
